Ready for the Next Evolution 13 y
raw nurse is in and studying for her rawsome certification
This week I discovered an inner strength that I never knew existed. I had the most awesome weekend off then the trial of my life began and I worked 12 hours EVERY DAY this week. Mornings I was in the office by 8:30 am and out by 1pm then to my regular job 3-11. I was amazed that I ate a lot of rawfoods during this time. I tended to stay away from the junk foods except for two or three days where I ate more SAD stuff because of PMS and stress. Even then I had it in the back of my head that eating the stuff wasnít going to make the stress of being the main breadwinner better.
I enrolled m ... read more
Dehydrated snacks for work 13 y
fail to plan is to plan to fail!
Or not...because I have to clean my dehydrator. Itís grody with old onions stuck on it, a victim of the move over and me being busy with other crap.
Hereís what I snack on at work when Iím getting stressed. I try to keep a lid on the snacking but hereís the basics:
1) fig newtons- MY ARCHENEMY esp. with peanut butter together but I didnít look for pb. I ate half of a pb sandwich.
2) crackers-graham crackers
3) lorna doones
5) cheap chocolate
Anyway, I know tomorrow will be better. Iím just bumming out guys. Love you guys. Iím going to take a melatonin and a ... read more
Depressed about life 13 y
negative nellie alert and one or two cusswords sprinkled in
Nursing sucks. I like taking care of old people but all people seem to be interested in is pumping them full of drugs, making them DNRs and gossiping. Plus, the snackfoods are crapola and I confirm that the snacks at work are wrecking my life. Forget the cooked death food at work,even the fignewtons.
Maybe five ounces of wheatgrass juice made me a little too sensitive to the negativity at work. It was unreal today. I effing hated that place today for all the work I did. Felt like I got nothing done except push dangerous drugs that dont work to little old ladies.
Seroquel causes perma ... read more
My emotional post at Rawfood Rehab 13 y
it's on today folks...work party but I'm bringing rawfood baby
I just left a voicemail for my confessor. Things have been getting progressively worse physically for me. I do feel that the Lord is leading me in the direction of fasting, prayer and rawfoods to heal my stomach. I am just emotional right now because Iíve never had major health issues and now I have a health challenge with my challenge. Iím so glad Jesus has a lot of patience because I went to church after work and I could just picture him saying, ĒWhere you been? You left me hanging!Ē and I have because I get so withdrawn when Iím worried about my health and the possibility of cancer. Why ... read more
Sadness...unhappiness 13 y
ride my bike cure my depression?
I need prayer big time. Just feeling sad constantly. Unhappy. For what reason? Iím just a sad sack today. Please God help me. Sent my husband out for some dark chocolate and I have a green smoothie jar at work. Iím sure no one touched it like they touched the pizza last night!
Broke my fast yesterday afternoon but thatís not why Iím sad. Oh well. Perhaps Iíll ride my bicycle no matter the weather today. Iíll need it. Motherís Day is the most overrated holiday since Valentineís Day. Iíll put on a happy face for my residents but even my coworkers are noticing Iím not my usual high energy ... read more
Day 5/21 tired woke up in the middle of the night 13 y
up in the middle of the night
Wow ever wake up out of a deep sleep and have to pee bad??? My nabe across the street died and so the ambulance was idling for a while. I put myself back to sleep saying a prayer for the lady. I almost broke my smoothie feast for real and ate a chocolate bar. I decided not to eat the chocolate bar but opted for some chocolate cream in my coffee. While itís a technical cheat the important thing is that I didnít drive out to the drugstore to buy a dark chocolate bar and eat the whole thing. It wouldnít have made me feel better.
Iím tired today though so I may have to take a nap. OR maybe ... read more
Day 4/21 Friday cheat day 13 y
get behind me demon peanut butter!!!!!!
I ate peanut butter today. Not a tragic event but I decided to not put pb in my smoothies but use flaxseed oil instead. I had two tablespoons of pb in my mouth which is a little cheating to me and I felt I was gonna go to the dark side (of crackers, bread,etc). Iím going for a bike ride now. My husband isnít at home and its my day off. So bored. I took my nap and feel a little foggy headed as I woke up super early to go to mass today.
I had a good BM and didnít want to ruin my green smoothie feast with peanut butter leading me to the road of perdition. We shall see what the yield of pb ... read more
Depression! DAY 3/21 13 y
severe depression hit me today
Oh good grief I didnít even make it through one day without telling a lie to my mom. She called and wanted to chat and I knew sheíd catch on that I was depressed so I LIED. Way to go girl that just had confession yesterday :( I went upstairs and took a good nap. Today I must go to work. Tomorrow I have the day off again.
Making green smoothies. The kitchen is in an upheaval. Not going to watch Top Chef Masters anymore. People have a prideful sense of importance and smugness and itís just food. Theyíre not saving anyoneís life. Mother Theresa died and no one really noticed. visit the page
Day 2/21 13 y
feeling a little better today 2/21 no solid foods
Morning coffee with star thistle honey and a little milk... After this week, Iím jettisoning the milk completely for the rest of the feast/fast. Anyhow, Iím sticking to my 3 cups of coffee a day goal even though itís my day off. Iíve had two cups so Iím saving the last cup for later.
Itís gorgeous outside. I want to bike ride and so Iím packing extra green smoothies today. Last night, I didnít get as hungry as I thought because I was so busy. I did have issues controlling my energy but itís all good. Got the job done!
I need to poop. I took some colace which is gross and so later Iím ... read more
Juice fast/green smoothies 13 y
My name is Ren and I'm a food addict
Iíve been going through some heavy stuff, lots of depresssion. I feel a video is more appropriate and when I get my own video camera, I will make more videos. Until then, Iím expressing how I feel and what Iíve been going through. Yesterday, I realised that I am a food addict and my deep seated fear of canser from all what I experienced with my mother.
Anyhow, I prayed for an answer to my stomach problems and I keep getting fasting coming back. I keep resisting and resisting. Today Iím not eating solid food, just juice, smoothies and water and three cups of coffee daily. I have more I w ... read more
Bumpus Acres 13 y
a little this and that
Thatís the name of our family homestead. I went to mass early this morning and returned home for a relaxing morning. went outside and dug a patch for greens, chard, lettuce, radishes and the last piece of the patch for wheatgrass. I have a box of GOLD...yeah well rotted chicken poop from my GLOP...gorgeous ladies of poultry. Anyway, I went through such a shit storm last week, Iím still reeling a little bit. Getting back to eating 80%-90% rawfoods. I dipped down to about 50% during the last week but weight is steady at 145.
Iím realising that gardening is my ikigai, my reason for being a ... read more
What I've been up to! It's deep man... 13 y
be strong in the Lord...juice/smoothie feasting this weekend for spiritual fortitude
Pain Iíve never known:
Today I was watching Biggest Loser with my husband as we typically do. While watching Drea talk about hating being fat when she was young, instantly reminded me of something truly truly TERRIBLE from my childhood and I just hear this voice saying Where was your Jesus when those things happening and what a horrible horrible girl I was for some unfortunate encounters that are just way too graphic for this website. I felt so embarassed and really really dirty in the moment and I just feel like poop right now. Devil wastes no time in making my life miserable after I rec ... read more
Made of dust (horrible Holy Week? Half-half) 13 y
God got my attention as always!
Good Friday I missed all prayer services, sat I worked and Sunday morning I missed mass because of work the day before, my mind worn down with sin. When you feel distant from God for whatever reason it makes it easier to let things go by the wayside. Anyhow, I begged forgiveness many times and asked God to help me at work because I was by myself with sick little old ladies who needed a lot of attention. I have no idea why the Lord picked me to be a nurse. Iím wretched, Iím eternally fearfilled about caring for someoneís dying parents. This whole week was disorganized. I had no idea where i ... read more
Day off!!!! Woohoo and it's going to be warm folks 13 y
Hey guys today is my day off. Iím so excited about having a whole day off. I was telling my husband that this Lent didnít go exactly the way I wanted it to but thatís life. Iím not making anymore serious plans. That just invites more guilt and self hatred. Iím just going with the flow of life and allowing the positive things to come in. Even so today Iím going for 100% raw with a lot of green smoothies and juicing. It ought to be easy since I got paid and can stock up my rawfood kitchen. My husband has a few appointments out in the field so Iím going with him. I hope that I can make it bac ... read more
Conscious choice to be happy 13 y
turnaround in mood this morning
Iím planting seed dreams today. Planting my garden seeds in trays that will go into the earth and give me more greens and rawfood goodness that I can handle. This morning I was still not feeling right and at one point, I started thinking I really want to be happy today. Except I just didnít have the energy and then God gave me a slap upside the head and now I feel like a human being again. I really need to remember íthoughts are thingsí íwhat you think about it, you bring aboutí and most important today is Holy Thursday and I have lots to be thankful for.
Yesterday, my coworkers refused ... read more
Here comes Auntie Flo (graphic descriptions of cooked junk foods and some use of the b-word) 13 y
the inner biyatch cometh out to-day
Yeah I felt the cravings and the bitchiness all at once. It was super intense. Yes Iím telling you thank goodness I made as many jars of green smoothies as I did. OTHERWISE, I would have mortally wounded my raw lifestyle than a bruise or strain if you will. I just started feeling totally dejected as the afternoon went on. Thereís a negative vibe going around at work then my belly felt bloated and you ladies know what Iím talking about. You just know the period is coming.
I didnít eat as much as I could have and I probably could have drank way more coffee but something inside of me knew ... read more
Day 1/2 or 1/4? I had to eat at work tonight guys 13 y
holy week fast bump in the road
Previous Page, Page 5
I finished off my jar of juice, smoothie and by the time 2230 rolled around my sugar was in the toilet and plus I got swamped with orders. Iím not totally disappointed but Iím a little bummed out because I almost made it through the day without eating. Itís just because of my job being overwhelming and burning through more of my energy/sugar that I anticipated that I broke my fast. Broke it with a fig newton, two graham crackers, peanut butter and five triscuits. Not terrible but whatever!
Today was truly overwhelming. I guess I ought to be happy that I got to have some wonderful juice ... read more