Sorry it's taken forever for me to get back to you but I didn't forget you!
I know it's been a while since this dream and you may not be in the same circumstances but I'd like to share my thoughts with you. Very interesting, rich dream, even if I don't get it right on the head.
The way I see it is marriage/wedding is a committment. Have you entered any kind of external or internal committment to yourself or others around this timeframe? Even on the mental/internal plane?
So I asked myself, What are you avoiding about this 'groom'? Archetypally, it would appear that you are 'marrying' the feminine and masculine. But since you are averted from aggreeing to this (masculine groom), maybe it is saying you need to embrace the feminine aspect more. I'll explain below. But maybe you don't adhere to the normal archetype. Do you feel you have more masculine qualities than feminine?
Now, you are 'kidnapped' unexpectedly. So this is something in your subconscious, possibly. Someone else has directed this drastic change. This may symbolize you are feeling trapped and restricted. Or it may mean that you are diverted away from some goals or desires. But still, you agree to the kidnapping, so you are really happy not to have to marry this 'groom'.
What is most telling to me is at this point, when you are so welcome and comfortable with your ex's family. You enjoy their company and even exchange a loving moment with him. Mind you, it is in the bedroom, which is a place of intimacy with our partners. And for ourselves, this can symbolize, simply, intimacy with the deepest parts of ourselves. What is so wonderful about this is the love was reciprocated!!! What a wonderful feeling.
Since you explained that in real time the ex did pamper you physically and emotionally, it does seem that is exactly what you may be in need of at the time of the dream. Or, maybe instead of accepting this committment, or endeavor, you are internally deciding that you really need some love and deep comfort.
Darn, you know I always come up to the simple questions once I've gone through lots of thought and complication! Oh, well, just the way I work right now I guess.
Are you embarking on a new love relationship to another withdrawer/withholder? Or maybe you are looking outside to another person to fill this deep necessity for love, that we all have by the way, when your Inner Self is calling you to 'court' that relationship with yourself.
Please let me know what you think.