Even though things seem bad, life is still what you make of it. Im dealing with some of the same issues as you and at times things seem so horrible that I feel like I cant take it anymore but I know that I can make it.....so can you. You have to learn to tune out all the words and stares. Who cares what everyone else has to say! They do not have a "heaven or hell" to put you in so what other people say really doesnt matter. It took me along time to decide to live this thing out and not let it take me out. Every new thing I see on here to try, most of them ive tried with not prevail. God only gave us one chance at this human experience. Enjoy it to the fullest!