Thank you for your interest. There are two main reasons.
During my 8 days 'let’s-fix-depression' fast I've got several insights about myself ... not very flattering though. Fasting worked but it was not what I expected. Also, during the fast I was sliding deeper and deeper into … some realizations which perhaps I was not (yet) ready to face. So, when a birthday party invitation came I convinced myself that I have to go. In hindsight, I think I was scared to fast further. Physically I felt ok, mostly without any appetite, but emotionally it was just too much for me.
Another side of the coin is my weight. I’ve been a junky vegetarian for years, consistently having about 80 pounds more than I need. I’m sure that I can fast for 20 days straight and perhaps that I can be a disciplined eater for a week or two after that. But I know myself, sooner or later I will go back to my old habits. 20 days is just not long enough to reset all ‘buttons’, to clean my body and to give me confidence that need.
So, my plan is sort of compromise. It should slow down mental and emotional cleaning and at the same time, it should give me enough time to acquire healthy eating habits. I know it is not ideal but this is best I came up with.
Your comments are appreciated as always. (But today is Day 2, so please be gentle.)