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Re: Attraction
Andreas Moritz Views: 1,021
Published: 18 years ago
This is a reply to # 493,033

Re: Attraction

Feeling attracted to someone else great qualities actually shows that you have these same qualities, too, but they are subdued due to fear and low confidence. You love these in him because you want to have these in your own life, but deny that you have them. This is not love per se, but a longing to be whole, complete within yourself. He mirrors back to you what you ought to be yourself, for yourself. This can have an intimidating effect because you feel you don't have what he has. The comparison brings out the worthiness ir esteem issue. I suggest let him do this, and show your weakness or vulnerability to him or others. As you do this, the fear element around this part of your personality has a chance of diminishing and you can then develop those qualities you so admire in him within yourself. Many realtionships nowadays are formed because people are searching in the other for what they seem to be lacking in themselves. THis creates a neediness and attachment that eventually creates conflict and ends the relationship. If you are interested to learn more about all that, my book Freedom from Judgment, goes into great details (see my website


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