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Tired of dating. Sorry, long post...
thinker Views: 888
Published: 18 years ago

Tired of dating. Sorry, long post...

Is anyone else tired of the same o'l stuff?

For those of you who are regulars, you know me fairly well. I'm a pretty no nonsense sort of guy. I say what I mean, and yes sometimes I should say it a little nicer. I don't play games, and think that they really have no place in my life. If I offend someone I always make an honest attempt to explain myself and my intentions, so as to aleve some of the infraction. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.

A year ago I decided to stop dating... as most of you know, I am a single father, and don't like to date infront of my child. I believe kids are a product of adult relationships, not a member. Atleast not till it becomes a marraige, and even then, their roll is observer, guidline, benifit. They don't deserve the stress we adults put ourselves though when dating, but I don't mind letting them reep the rewards.

So the "non-dating" thing lasted for about 6 months. I met a beautiful lady on a business trip and as luck would have it she lived just down the road from me. We hit it off very well and began dating. I explained to her, or atleast tried to explain to her, my ideas about dating and children. She knew right that I had a child, and very much wanted to meet her. I put if off for a while, about 5 1/2 months actually. She saw pictures and my child knew I was seeing someone, but there were no sleep overs and there was no drama, as far as the kid knew. Yes, it isn't always easy, but I try.

So after five and a half months, I set up a chance for the two to meet. To be honest, I had really fallen for the girl and was even looking at promise rings. Yes, I take things slow. There was some tension as the date approached, from the girl I was dating, but it didn't seem like anything that would blossom out of control. The big day came, things went fairly well... they met, had a great time, talked, shared... it was looking very good.
Then it happened. For whatever reason, maybe she realized that I was serious by allowing her to meet my child or maybe something else clicked in her head, but the problems got steadly worse and worse. We went from not being able to see each other enough, and talking two to three times a day, to occasional phone calls, and fixed dates for contact. Finally on one of those fixed dates she brings up something that was said in jest months ago... she doesn't remember the humor of the time, just that now that she thinks about it, it offends her. I tried to play it off, remind her that it was a joke. ( we were shopping and I made a joke about how it was a woman's job to push the cart. It would be a big deal if I made jokes like that all the time, or even believed in gender rolls, but I don't and she knows it.) She just kept going though. I finally stopped and asked her what she meant, and what was she trying to do... it suddenly became me picking an argument. I just said "oh" and kept walking.... the date progressed and things got steadly better again, but the foundation was laid.
Today she returned my call, and when I said I love you (nothing new, I say it all the time and normally so does she) her response was, "hmm". I tried again... same response.

I don't get women. I don't understand them, and they drive me crazy. I am sure it doesn't help that I will be moving shortly, but she has known this for months. My job is transfering me out of state. I thought this might be part of the problem, but honestly was trying everything to tell her that I didn't mind the distance, and that a couple years apart would seem very small when looking back after a lifetime (small hint on my part that I was considering the ring) Nothing worked though. She found every small detail that she could to pick.

Today was the last straw. I finally told her that I was tired of it, and that the drama was not going to help things. Then I broke it off with her.

Six months washed away... I know things will get better. I am moving and will meet new people, I always do. I guess I am just tired of going over the same stuff...

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