Every family has its specific dynamics, and every person its ways to deal with them. These are probably among the deepest issues one has to face and really, at such a visceral level, one has to follow the guts and not others' advice. But I'll tell you what I think anyway.
I wrote a lot and talked a lot, and if I went back now I would waste less energy in this because it didn't change much. So, I could have stopped at the first scene with my mother where I told her my feelings and she freaked out, and then disappear. Parents accuse a lot the going away and disappear, at least mine. Because you know, the problem is that your parents NEVER, NEVER listen to you. And when you talk of something very important it is really frustrating to see this.
So for me the bones of the dealing with them are:
- say mom you don't do this to me any more, because I won't allow it, for this and that reason
- leaving (it can be not for ever, but they shouldn't know)
The explaining again and again is instead totally useless, frustrating and it divours an amazing quantity of energy.
And there is another point:
- try to live your life, no matter what
This dealing with my past has held me back a lot, my energies were directed backwards (thing that was present in my handwriting also, with many strokes going backwards because I'm left-handed). But when you take actions that express love for yourself the universe sends you many helps, and I didn't miss anything important after all, luckily.
After dealing with them, it is with yourself you've got to deal with, with the distortions their behaviour created in you, and that is probably the job of a lifetime, going from the gross to the more subtle.
(I haven't tried yet to see what effect the magic handwriting may have on others. It cannot harm anyway!)