Weeelll, the FIRST thing that I would suggest would be to take control of the situation, as in, get on top, honey! Clitoral stimulation is very important, especially when you are "learning" how to achieve cllmax. When you're on top, you can control the rythym and the depth of penetration, and the skin-to skin(clitoris to skin) contact. Be proactive!
also, during sex, be selfish! Do the moves that please YOU! Focus on how YOU feel, this might sound strange, but focus your conciousness on your genital region. REALLY FEEL the sensations...you ARE responsible for your own pleasure... :) Don't worry about him. Men are simple. They always come, and there's nothing like a ravenous female to really set 'em off...
You should really start playing with yourself, spanking the monkey, too...and I would suggest NOT using a vibrator, YET. The sensations from a vibrator are very intense and cannot be duplicated...and I really think that you need to get to know your body right now.
Also, sex gets better for females the older we get. :)
and, to the poster that suggested that some females don't acheive cllmax? Well, I do believe that ALL females have a clitoris...and I DO believe that the ONLY function of the clitoris is ...pleasure... :)