It’s easy to misinterpret on the Web -- I also wasn’t scolding, more saying Hey, you sound pretty intense on this one, and I’m just not intense about it. And it sounds like you interpreted what I wrote earlier to mean things that I would never intend, so maybe we are both misunderstanding each other. I’ve been enjoying this thread, reading people’s thoughts on how men & women are. Some things I agree with, some I don’t, but it’s fun to see other people’s ideas on it. Ciao, or however that’s spelled, I’m outta here, take care   [End]
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Hi - if you’re feeling like this while knowing that guy as well as you must, I just want to say your concerns are worth taking really seriously & getting all the backup you can to be safe. Carolyn Hax the advice columnist tells people in your situation to call 1-800-799-SAFE, there would be advisors there who are familiar with situations like this. Take care   [End]
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Where did that all come from? Kinda sounds like you’re reading a whole lot into what I said that I would never intend. I was enjoying this conversation, weren’t you? And I’m not at all wanting to debate this with you, life’s too short and it’s just not something I’m angry about.   [End]
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I heard it’s the malic acid in the apples that helps with dissolving stagnant bile, but the apples have lots of good nutrients in them too. On Julia Chang’s gallbladder flush site she says people with candida should take malic acid supplements w/water instead of getting the malic acid from apple juice, so probably either would be OK. Though I bet the malic acid is easier to absorb from apple juice than supplements.   [End]
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I heard it’s the malic acid in the apples that helps with dissolving stagnant bile, but the apples have lots of good nutrients in them too. On Julia Chang’s gallbladder flush site she says people with candida should take malic acid supplements w/water instead of getting the malic acid from apple juice, so probably either would be OK. Though I bet the malic acid is easier to absorb from apple juice than supplements.   [End]
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Candida will make a white-coated tongue, & would be a common inhabitor of the mouth. Maybe your immune system/liver is just recovering from the flush for a day or so, so it isn’t fighting off the baddies as well as it normally does. Just a guess. If it’s candida, I’ve found scrubbing the tongue with listerine is easier/quicker than the other things I’ve tried, or you could try a natural anti-fungal like diluted tea tree oil.   [End]
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Johanna, thanks much for your post. I went ahead & did the epsom salts last night because life was too uncomfortable & feel better this a.m. Still don’t know if there is a stone stuck. Starting to think I may just be having a bad reaction to the epsom salts, like first diarrhea then feeling like I ate cement mix. If it gets worse again I’ll be on it, and your ideas are much appreciated. (Sure was a more peaceful night last night, knowing your ideas of what might help if there’s a stone. No fun doing this stuff in an information vacuum.) Take care, Maia   [End]
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Hi, just saying that even though I agree with you sometimes & disagree with you sometimes, I always enjoy the heck out of your posts because you’re always honest & just right out there with what you think.   [End]
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Hi Aaron, about the ways you’ve noticed women acting in courtship, that make you roll your eyes -- I just have to comment, seeing as I’m not feeling like working yet this morning. I think you’re hanging around with the wrong women! Because a lot of the women I know don’t play courtship games. Of course we’re all older, but I know there must be young women who don’t too. (Can’t remember which game/behaviour you’re talking about so I’ll just call it games, substitute whatever action it is that’s eye-ball rolling.) Maybe it’s just that you get what you expect -- you expect the eye-ball r ...
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In my opinion it’s totally OK to break up on the phone in this situation. Sure, in person is better usually. But here, you’d have to arrange a visit to see him -- either you’d have to hide what you need to do and lead him to expect a fun visit, or be up front with it and then you’d break up anyway. Breaking up in person is a matter of respect & honoring an important relationship, but hiding your reason for a visit would be far more disrespectful to him. Tell him you’re so sorry you are talking to him on the phone instead of in person. It’s just rough being so far apart for something ...
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Hi, did a flush 2 nights ago, and though my gallbladder feels fine I think I might have a big stone moving through my large intestine. Pretty backed up. Any thoughts about what might help? Looked in FAQ & didn’t see this. I’m drinking a lot of water, eating salads & ground flaxseed fiber, taking cod liver oil. Suppose I could take epsom salts again, not sure if that would be a good idea or not. Thanks.   [End]
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I tend to ignore statistics, because they can bend any which way. But what I notice is, you aren’t *sure* this is a good idea. Such a big decision, I wouldn’t do it unless I was sure. Moving out again would be a pain. If she’s the right girl for you, it’ll work out whether you live with her or not. Maybe this is just hard because you’re trying to decide right now. Even though waiting to decide might feel like being up in the air & uncomfortable, so much can happen in 8 months. Whenever I try to decide something for a time so long in the future, things always change anyway, so the dec ...
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Here’s one woman’s opinion -- whether she should let go or not doesn’t matter, because you can’t make her let go & you can’t make her trust you, even if she should. If she won’t go to counseling, then it’s something she doesn’t want to work on. Then you get to decide -- Do you want to stay with someone who doesn’t trust you? Whatever you find attractive about her that makes you want to stay, is it worth living with her mistrust? If it were me in your shoes, I’d tell her again that I wanted to go to counseling, & explain specifically how the situation was hurting me. (Because hey, this i ...
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Hi! Couldn’t listen to your music, I am extremely non-literate on computers! Bummer. Nice thought. I’ve been in your shoes, a guy did this to me. IMO she’s stringing you along, maybe not on purpose. Probably she does have conflicting feelings about her boyfriend, and connecting w/you would just stem from that. It’s selfish/thoughtless though, from the woman’s side, to know that a guy wants to date you when you’re not available & to keep flirting with him. If I know a guy is interested, I am so very careful not to flirt. She’s not caring much about your feelings. You’re ...
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Hi Aaron, I can tell by how you write & what you write, you will be a catch for the girl who is lucky enough to be right for you! And you seem to be *so* headed in a good direction. Good luck to you & take care.   [End]
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You sound like a catch, and I’m not flirting, I’m 40, too old for you! (o: Especially a catch because you’re bothering to look into possibly changing how you do things. Some various thoughts -- you’re 22. Most women that age probably aren’t ready for strong marriage-type relationships -- maybe you will find as you get older and the women around you are more mature, they will want to date you. In other words, you might be someone whom they instinctively know is marriage-quality, not ”play around & have a fling” quality. At that age, all I was ready for were flings. Another thought... ...
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Hey, just tossing in a comment to say that what you did, to me, sounds completely human. You were in the process of letting go of a longterm, profound relationship -- a marriage. Healing from something like that takes time. I’ve heard it can take as long to release a relationship as to build it. It takes time to gradually get ”unconnected” from such an intense bond. It would be so human to express the remaining connection, in the way you used to expressing it with your wife. To me it sounds like the trouble isn’t something wrong with you at all, it’s just that you formed a new ...
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You say you refuse to let anyone treat you this badly, but you are staying there letting him treat you this badly.   [End]
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Thanks for your post! Neptunian dreamer, L, I’m such a dreamer too. Grounding will always be something I have to work at. Know what you mean about gardening & dirt-digging, I loved it too, but I live in an apartment now. So I have to ground by going to eat lunch! ;o) Take care, sending you a smile --   [End]
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I was just reading Karlin’s message, and realized I also want to emphasize that this quality is such a gift. Being an intense, vividly-feeling person with a lot of energy potential is such an incredible gift. Too often in my culture, it seems like the opposite is valued, all the energy & dreaming is trained out of us in school and by people who want us to behave and not color outside the lines. I think some people are just afraid of what it might be like to have a lot of energy, so they block themselves and frown on intensity in others. But it’s a gift, being an energy person, it’s an incr ...
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Hi, I practice a form of energywork based on grounding... Grounding helps to anchor one’s energy more firmly in the body. An important part of grounding is just learning to do the basics of taking care of oneself -- American culture at least tends to teach people to go so fast they often don’t take care of themselves. If I want to work on my grounding, I do little things that help me feel more like being here in my own life. Like if my desk is messy & it stresses me, I’ll organize it. Or wash the dishes, put on warm socks (it’s cold here today!), wash my bedsheets, pick up the things I’ve ...
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I had a rash like that and it was a candida imbalance. Might be worth reading up on candida symptoms & risk factors, especially if you’d previously been on antibiotics or crave starchy carbs/sweets. Good luck.   [End]
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Thanks so much to you both for your thoughtful replies. I will try each of your suggestions -- and Jhan that’s comforting about the vaginitis healing closer to last. I’ve been wondering if something was wrong because it was taking this long while other things were improving. Take care, wishing you both well!   [End]
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I’ve been wanting to try taking apple cider vinegar, but I’ve read that it can make candida-type vaginitis much worse even though it helps for candida otherwise. Do any of you have experiences with this one way or the other? Thanks.   [End]
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No, they aren’t always right and sometimes they play power games. Questions like this get me going, pre-soapbox warning! (o: I would seriously question the ethics, compassion and integrity of a reader who would tell you such scary things. Believe me, she knew she was scaring you. No one could say such frightening things without knowing it. That sounds like a power trip to me. Not necessarily something she did consciously, (most people not so wicked!) but people can have a lot of baggage that directs their actions without their knowledge. A person might say, but what if she saw th ...
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I agree with Nicole. I think mercury fillings are unhealthy for kids but I know I was oblivious to health as a child. Running around so fast I didn’t really feel it even when I was sick. I also know in hindsight I got health effects from the mercury when I was younger than 10 -- that’s when I started getting fungal rashes from candida, not enough to bother but enough that something was wrong. And allergies. And I caught colds a lot etc. Now that my candida’s more under control, rashes are almost gone, no allergies anymore, and I haven’t had a cold in years. All that... starting when I got ...
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I had my last filling out 6 days ago. Had 3 fillings for 30 yrs or so, actually had 5 at first but 2 had to be crowned over the years. Anyway, no problems with extraction because they were small fillings & a careful dentist. Not a biologic dentist unfortunately. I have pretty intense candida, lifelong. Haven’t been able to work for 5 yrs because of health effects. Didn’t notice a terrible candida reaction from amalgam removal other than being more fatigued for a couple of days. Detoxing with cilantro, chlorella, lots of water, fresh-juiced carrot/parsley juice daily, selenium as well a ...
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