Healthy 22y/o male, began taking 20mg melatonin about three months ago, experienced extreme and sudden libido decrease, stopped dosing immediately after experiencing decrease (that was over two mont...
I would like to preface this with an apology if this is not an appropriate question for this discussion. If it is not, I would appreciate a referral to the appropriate subreddit. I also apologize if any of these details are superfluous; I merely want to give as holistic a view of my life as possible. I would have written a shorter post but I didn't have the time. Thanks in advance.
As I mentioned, I am a healthy man. I just turned 22, I was raised vegetarian and switched to vegan in 2015 (I take a methylated b-complex and vitamin k-2 and iodine), I'm soy-free, grain-free, and sugar-free. Please click the link below to see a complete list of the supplements I take. I meditate for 20min 5-7 days/week followed by 10-20min of positive visualizations. I do cardio 5-6 days/week and weights about 2 days/week.
I love my life right now. I took a gap year for 2019/2020 and travelled and applied to transfer to a fantastic school in the midwest and was accepted. I know what I want to do with my life and am psyched to get to a place that will help me do that. I'm currently on a second gap year (didn't want to pay for online classes) and just got a job at a new high-end organic produce/health food store/juice bar opening in my town which I'm very pumped for because I'm super passionate about that stuff. I do not look at the news and try to read books as much as I can. I'm not afraid or anxious in general like most people unfortunately are these days. I don't use social media (except for reddit). I have great friends and brothers and I have been hooking up (no sex) with a really sweet and beautiful and wicked smart bombshell who is about a decade older than me. 2020 was a fantastic year for me and 2021 looks like it will be just as good if not better.
I don't watch p 0 r n o g r a p h y, either, and practice semen retention (aka nofap). The longest I retained for was about 440 days. I ceased formal retention practice late in the summer because I no longer felt I needed to do it. I instead released only about once a week. And I did that for a few months and had a great libido (I have begun practicing retention again in an effort to restore my libido but it does not seem to be doing anything). What's strange is there was a period of about a week just before I felt the libido decrease that my libido and penile sensitivity was crazy high and I seemed to be producing significantly more sperm than usual.
And then basically one morning I woke up and just felt lame. I felt like I was in limbo. I stopped getting random boners/morning wood and when I did get one, it was soft and passionless. I tried playing with yourself, spanking the monkey and became distracted by other thoughts and disinterested in sex. I've always felt like I've been a more sexual person than most and I have never experienced anything close to this. At this point, I had been taking 20mg of melatonin basically every night for just under a month (I know, asinine). As I mentioned, I of course stopped dosing immediately after experiencing this 'limbo' feeling. I thought it might take a week or two at maximum for my body to reset. That was about 3 months ago and I still feel the same. I should mention that I was wearing a quarter of a 21mg NicoDerm patch (~5mg) for a few days surrounding the beginning of my symptoms. I stopped that as well immediately even though it is likely not the culprit because nicotine usually increases t levels. I know it is a vasoconstrictor as well but those effects are short-term. I also microdose LSD about once a week. I've been doing that for a few months.
I started seeing a renowned doctor/chiropractor/holistic practitioner in NYC a few days after my symptoms started. We ran a blood test and my vitamins minerals were all good, prolactin levels were normal (prolactin suppresses testosterone for those of you who do not know). L-Carnitine was the only thing that was off so he tested a couple of supplements on me and gave me one which I have been taking for the past few weeks. He also said I have a leaky gut problem (hence my grain-free diet) which could be contributing. For that he gave me an l-glutamine supplement combined with some other stuff. I forgot to include those two supplements in the table. I very highly doubt that is the issue, though, as I seem to have had a leaky gut for many years. It should be healed within the next couple of months though so we'll see what that does. I also did a saliva hormone profile about a week ago and my testosterone levels are high and healthy. I have included a link to that report below. My night cortisol levels are very high but cortisol changes so frequently and that still does not explain my symptoms earlier in the day.
Like I said, I've been hooking up with this amazing broad and I of course want to have sex with her really bad and love kissing her, etc. I get a boner when I'm with her but it feels almost like an automated boner like there's not as much sensitive energy as there should be in it. The main thing is that my penis feels about as sensitive as my finger. I used to love touching my frenulum but now it just feels like regular skin. And trust me it is not this girl in specific because even in other situations where I should be getting rock I just don't. Before this seemingly melatonin-induced libido crash, I used to make eye contact with this girl and I would feel a whole-body animalistic 'rawr' sensation. If I was really close to her for more than 30 seconds I would precum. Don't get me wrong she turns me on like crazy and I love every second I'm around her but I'm missing that full body super passionate jolt of testosterone 'animal' feeling.
As I mentioned, I'm sorry if any of this is superfluous. I am super desperate and worried that I might have done long-term damage. Please help. Any thoughts would be highly appreciated. Lots of love to you all ❤️