get out

I am so sorry that you've experienced this for so long.  There is only one way to stop this abuse, and he's not going to do it - you will.  You'll stop it by leaving, and leaving ASAP.  When abusers choose isolated living arrangements, it's not to live a self-sufficient and self-sustaining lifestyle.  It's so that they can perpetrate their crimes against their victims without the fear of witnesses.  I know this from personal experience. 

You know what you're dealing with, and you may not realize that you are a valuable part of this vast Universe after so many years of abuse.  But, you are.  And, to survive this, you will need to exit in secret and without threats of leaving.  When victims announce or even hint that they intend to leave, they are in the most danger because the abuser doesn't want its property disappearing.

Yes, they are "charming" on a superficial basis, and most people would never believe that they are capable of what they do.  But, they are quite capable of inflicting damages on every level. 

Visit this website to learn where your closest resources are, and begin planning an exit strategy with the closest agency available.  You will have to do this in complete secret - do not tell ANYONE about this, even children, family, friends, etc.. 

www.ndvh.org

You have a choice, now.  You can either save yourself and your very life, or you can allow this piece of shit to stomp your soul into the ground before he ends your life, one way or another. 

My most brightest protective blessings to you